Today's core belief is one that every single person has experienced at some point in their lifetime. There is no way to avoid it because at the most basic level, it's an opinion and nobody can argue with your opinion, right? Wrong. This core belief is the epitome of a crutch and one that needs to depart your vocabulary and way of thinking, immediately. While it definitely applies to addiction, it also applies to every other aspect of your life, and once you quit drinking you will quickly find there is no need for this kind of thinking anymore. It is a negative and limiting core belief that will keep you in a stagnant emotional state for the rest of your life, if you let it. So, don't let it.
Thinking back to yesterday's blog, I am powerless, if you say you are powerless, you are. Subsequently, if you say you are not ready, you are not ready. It's time to start accessing the simplest of human power that is at the ready for us every single day. We carry an enormous amount of power, that most animals do not possess, with us everywhere we go. Most animals react to their surroundings based on instinct and survival. We have the power of choice. We make thousands of choices every day; some conscious, some subconscious; but all are ours. We have the innate ability to decide with which foot we step first, which direction to take that step, with how much weight we want to place on that step, and with how much speed we want to travel. It's all up to you.
I am not ready
If you have never heard the following statement before then it is time to finally hear it, if you have heard it before it never hurts to hear it again; you will never be ready. Think about it, if you were ready you would already be on the sober path. Readiness is the state of being fully prepared for something. You will never be fully prepared for anything while engaged in an addiction, accept remaining in the addicted state. There is no perfect time to quit drinking. There are no scenarios that guarantee an easier time of sobriety than others. I am truly sorry if you were hoping to hear me tell you that if you wait long enough, the perfect moment to quit drinking or any addiction will present itself to you. The longer you wait, the further away from readiness you drift. Picture readiness as the inner tube you slipped off in the ocean. You can keep swimming out to sea chasing after it, or you can turn around and swim directly to shore and to safety. Both will be difficult, but only one will get you what you need.
Remember what I said in the Crash Course blog about core beliefs. It is a belief that we hold and we continuously seek evidence to support that belief. If I say I am not ready to quit drinking and therefore don't quit, I have then just supported my core belief. If I try to quit, but then fail, I have also supported my core belief. If I am easily distracted from quitting by friends or society, then I have supported my core belief. Anything that happens, anything that I do, anything that someone else does, or anything at all that keeps me from quitting my addiction actively supports my core belief that, I am not ready.
If you want to get out of the cycle of proving to yourself that you are not ready to quit your addictions, you have to change the way you think about your ability to actualize that desire. You have to change your core belief.
New Core Belief: I am ready
Once you truly take this on as a core belief, then the same cycle will occur but this time it will positively benefit you and your desire to quit your addictions. You will begin seeking out evidence that supports your belief that you are ready to quit drinking. You will see a sober day as evidence of your core belief. You will see each decision to not pick up a glass as evidence that you are ready. You will recognize your new feelings of strength as evidence of your core belief. You will see your new sober friends as evidence that you are ready. You will see, feel, taste, hear, and experience evidence all around you that support your belief that you are ready. This belief and evidence will propel you down your path of sobriety, and this time it will be an easier and more intentional path than ever before; because you are truly ready.
Is this easier said than done? Maybe, but if that is true for you, then you may not have fully committed to the core belief, yet. You can't half-ass a commitment to anything and expect good results, just like you can't half-ass your sobriety. Tell yourself every single day, multiple times a day, that you are ready and begin searching out and finding the evidence to support your belief. Even if you are not fully committed yet, I promise you the evidence is there. I am going to help you cheat here for a moment and show you that my previous statement is true. But then, you have to go out and find more evidence for yourself, that is your homework. Ready?
I am ready: Evidence #1 - You are reading or listening to this blog.